Featured Beer #10 – Paulaner Oktoberfest Wiesn

Sometimes, Size Does Matter

Before we go down a bad path here, content-wise, let’s discuss the date. It’s September 27th, and for any self-respecting drinker it’s a significant date because…c’mon…

…that’s right, Oktoberfest.

An aerial shot of Oktoberfest. Looks like a good time from what I can tell.

I’ll tell you this, the Germans know how to throw a party, and Oktoberfest is a party unlike any other. The event started because some important dude married some important chick back in the 1800’s, inviting all of Munich, and it just stuck. The fair lasts 16 days, from late September through the first weekend of October.

From what I gather, people drink beer there.

Thanks to its worldwide popularity, countless Oktoberfest beers are available at pretty much any grocery store. Given the fact I have to shop at a grocery store every once in a while, I bought an Oktoberfest beer. Paulaner Oktoberfest Wiesn to be precise.

So, what’s up the size does matter thing?

This beer wasn’t a six-pack. It wasn’t a single bottle. It wasn’t even an oversized bottle, called a bomber. It was the biggest can I’ve ever seen. And, it came with a giant mug to accommodate the ample volume.

It’s a big can and a big mug. And a small pumpkin, ‘cuz my wife likes to decorate. Seemed fitting though.

Now let me tell you, when full of beer, this mug is one heavy son of a bitch. Once you have drank the beer, however, this mug continues to prove itself useful:

– First off, it will hold a ton more beer when you need it to.

– Second, if an intruder breaks into your home and you manage to get your hands on this mug for defensive purposes, the intruder is all kinds of fucked.
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– Third, day too busy for the gym? Fill up the mug with any kind of beer and take sips at consistent intervals, switching up arms every 10 sips. Watch your forearms and biceps come alive.

– Finally, have a beer drinking friend and Christmas is a few days away? You can show him or her the mug and tell them next September, they can go to the grocery store and buy one as a gift to themselves.

Those are examples just off the top of my head. I’m sure there’s more.

Paulaner Oktoberfest Wiesn

How’s the beer you ask? I’ve got to be honest, I’m an IPA, stout, porter guy, BUT, I’m a beer guy first and foremost so did I like it? Yeah, it’s beer. I can get into the Oktoberfest spirit and partake.

What Paulaner did was went big with their Oktoberfest and they sucked me in, proving once again, albeit a different avenue entirely, that size does indeed matter.

As a side note, when not on vacation I usually have my VHT posts up bright and early Thursday morning, but after drinking this bitch last night I passed out while writing and had to finish this evening.


For now, it’s Oktoberfest time so get them while you can. But be warned, if you get Paulaner Oktoberfest Wiesn with the massive mug and plan to store it next to other smaller, less well-endowed beer mugs, don’t be surprised if the other mugs develop an inferiority complex.

They know size matters too.

We all struggle with it one way or another.

So cheers, and, Noch ein Bier, bitte!

Look it up.

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